The (Un)likely Homeschooler

Homeschooling was a 13-letter swear word.  The word I always imagined for the future when my daughters were toddlers but knew would never be my reality.  It was a foreign concept to my typical education upbringing. I had never even met a homeschooler, never mind actually become a homeschooling parent! When my daughters were babies, I had a very part-time job at a hair salon and finally met my first homeschooled human- a teenager, who was.... dare I say it? Social.  She knew how to have a conversation. GASP: All those myths were not true? Could it be possible that homeschool children may have the same personality traits as public-school children? There may be shy, slow to warm up, outgoing, and everything in between type of children no matter how they were educated? I was shocked! (Is there a sarcasm font?) All of those rumors I had been told about homeschoolers may not have been true. As my daughters grew older, I sent them on the expected path of preschool, then my oldest entered public school. With each day, I still longed to homeschool them- enjoying days outside, learning what interested them while fitting in what is necessary, and building on their strengths while gently encouraging all other subjects. Mornings felt torturous, with complaints
of loosely tied shoes, too tight pants, funny feelings in shirts and many belly aches. Nights were just as exhausting with pages of homework that took hours because of the long days and relentless tears at bedtime. 

These feelings of angst felt familiar to me. You see, school was not my favorite place. While I had some wonderful teachers, I still have the memories of feeling humiliated because I could not spell "of"- a simple word. At 6-years-old, I remember struggling to spell the word and instead of being helped, I was told to go back to my desk and figure it out.  No lifelines, no asking a friend- just figure it out. I fell behind on my work that day which still brings an anxious feeling to me today.  I remember the stomachache I had the next morning. Such a small moment in my education made me feel like a failure. Some people may ask if that is really a discouraging moment for a child. Yes, it is, because I am 35 years old now and I still remember the day, 29 years ago I felt shame over not being able to spell "of". As an adult, looking back at this classroom memory I wish I could explain to that little girl, tears filling in her eyes, that it is no big deal, that I will easily spell "of" one day.... and so much more.

Moving on, we went about our "normal". Cue March 2020, schools were shut down. No more daily four walls- the reading in our house flourished like I hadn't seen since they were toddlers asking to be read to, especially for my oldest daughter who lost interest in books. We spent the beautiful days outside, doing crafts and soaking up books. Books on the hammock, books on their swing set, books on the deck. Riding bikes and hikes took place of a formal gym class. The distance learning that was taking place at this time was much different than the distance learning that many children started in September 2020.  Other than the daily zoom, which was a struggle to get through to say the least, there was much free time for child-led learning.  When a decision needed to be made for the upcoming school year, I knew exactly what I wanted to do. It was finally my chance to pursue this opportunity with my daughters. Numbers of homeschoolers all over our state had increased and we were excited to be part of that number. Is everyday magical? NO! Are some days struggles? Absolutely. Is homeschooling for every family? Maybe not, but it is what is working for our family right now. We are halfway through our second year in homeschooling, and I am always learning about each child. As this journey continues, I look forward to sharing the struggles and celebrating the triumphs with my children and with others who want to be a part of this journey.